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5 Steps for Spiritual First Aid for the Nurse or Healing Practitioner
By Rita Amina Kluny, RN

There were times when I would be caring for eight babies at once, and the pressure was horrific. There was no way I could meet everyone’s needs; every day that I went to work it felt like I was trying to empty the ocean with a thimble. No matter how hard I worked, I was frustrated, because it was never good enough, fast enough, or anything enough.

Frightened parents, often frustrated by the system, would express their feelings to me. Because I was so tired, I would get defensive. I was doing the best I could, but that wasn’t enough, and their comments hurt me deeply. Many days I felt that the doctors, the other nurses, and the parents didn’t appreciate who I was or how much I had done. Every day I felt tired and sad.

Like me, many nurses work under conditions that are stressful, and we deal with people in crisis. If our perspective is only from the personality, that load is can be intensely heavy without spiritual strength in the equation. Too many great nurses leave the profession feeling used up and thrown away, because they don't know how to ease the stress and fatigue.

When I finally took steps to replenish myself spiritually, I learned how to see myself as God sees me. I could give myself mercy, and accept my humanity. I saw the trap of self-judgment and high expectations. I allowed myself to feel okay, and to be less dependent on the opinions of others. Through spiritual healing, I learned how to love myself.

What I learned is that we need to draw on our Ultimate Resource, which is the love of God, to accept who we are and how we respond to our challenges. With the strength of God in our hearts, we can deal with extra-long shifts, the depleted resources, and the emotional crises. And we can do this from a place of love, rather than allowing our pressures to bleed our hearts and suck us dry. This way, the anger can be transmuted to tap into our compassion and strength.

It has been said that you cannot give what you don’t have, and I really believe that. As I increasingly understand the highest meaning of self love, I can give that same kind of compassion and acceptance to others. In the past, I felt defensive when confronted with angry parents. Now I am able to recognize their anger as a sign of their own pain, and look past their anger to see that they are really just crying for help.

This new understanding allows me to be more accepting of how people act, and not take people’s behavior personally. I can be more compassionate and let go of performance anxiety and fear of punishment. Now, I can be more focused on someone’s heart by being in my heart. This connection makes it easier, more tender, and helps me see God in everyone.

Through this process I regained a sense of meaning and purpose as a nurse. I hope that you find the deepest value to the following five steps in spiritual first aid:

1) Become aware of how you feel in your heart. Notice stress or distress within yourself. Pay attention to what is going on within you. For example, if you feel sad, what does that feel like? How does that affect your thoughts, your body? What is happening inside your heart? What is happening is happening in you, so ask yourself: How are they making me feel? How is this making me feel?

This process takes awhile to even remember, especially in the beginning, because we are so used to looking outside ourselves for the solutions. (Nurses are some of the best problem solvers.) But as you develop the inner focus as the FIRST step, often times the clarity that comes can bring healthier options that don't come from fear or the need to control. And since we as nurses usually put our needs last, this is a revolutionary idea. Trust me! As you change inside, and become more anchored, your experience of the whole situation may change.

2) Face God where you are and ask for help. None of us is perfect. We weren’t made to be perfect. You wouldn’t kick someone out of a wheelchair because they couldn’t walk. So giving yourself some leeway about your own needs is perfectly appropriate. Simply accept where you are, and give yourself compassion for whatever is true for you at the time.

Can you make enough room in your heart to consider that your needs are actually holy? Make space in your heart for whatever you are feeling, even if you feel that you have done this a million times and it feels like God isn’t there.

3) Invite the reality of the love of God into wherever you are. The reality of the love of God is more than an intellectual concept. When you use the sacred language of God, the recitation of the name of God actually invokes the energy of that name, and the energy begins to flow. Whether you are aware of it or not, you will eventually find yourself experiencing more peace, calm, renewed hope, expansion, lightness, and acceptance.

When the reality of God has touched your heart, your being will change. And the beauty of it is, that because it is an internal experience, support is always available to you. Even if you think nothing is happening, look into your heart, and feel the difference. For more information on this process, I recommend reading an article called The Remembrance , listening to a CD , or taking the Spiritual Renewal & Infusion eClass (coming in June).

4) Open to receive guidance. Very often, the tendency is to think you won’t get guidance from a higher power. Don’t go there. Sometimes, it is just a matter of time. Be patient that you will receive, and trust what you get. Ask God how God would care for you, and listen for the answer in your heart.

5) Be your own caregiver. Follow your guidance. Ask yourself what you need to be successful in following your guidance. It could be as simple as stopping to eat. For example, my efficiency increases when I take the time to nourish my body with food. Another example is to remind yourself that you have the right to say no: “No, it doesn’t work for me to work an extra shift.” “No, it doesn’t work for me that you talk to me that way. ”

As I come to a close, I am reminded of several quotes I learned while a student at USHS and have been invaluable in my own remembering of who I am: When you know yourself, you will know your Lord. When you find the Love, you find your Self.

My deepest prayer for all of you is to give yourself a priceless gift. The gift is TIME. Time to stop, to reflect, to heal, to remember that you are precious. And most of all, you DESERVE to receive the deepest essence of who you really are, which is LOVE.

Free teleclass: Spiritual First Aid for Nurses

Free article: The Remembrance

CD: The Remembrance Prayer Kit

About the author:
Former AHNA Nurse of the Year (2002) Rita Amina Kluny presented Nursing in the Holy Way at the 2006 AHNA conference. She is a graduate of USHS, and currently a Masters candidate in Spiritual Ministry & Sufi Studies. A Healing Touch practitioner, Rita travels around the country giving workshops to grandmas, child care educators, and people who work with babies, as well as healthcare workers, and healing touch practitioners. Rita’s email is aminarita@earthlink.net.